Letting Go

May 1, 2015 - Category: family-blog
Letting Go
Perhaps the most difficult part of motherhood is letting go of our children.  A mother’s heart is to protect and provide for her children.  Our natural inclination is to hold our children close because in our arms we can be sure they are safe.
 
But God does not call us to control our world or our children’s world.  He does not call us to trust our own ability to keep our children safe from harm.  He calls us to trust Him.  He desires us to have faith that HIS arms are the only place our children are truly safe. 
 
If we try to hold on to our children they will have great difficulty learning to trust God themselves.  We will become “god” to them.   In their eyes, we will become the ultimate protector.  After all, if we cannot trust God with their lives, how can they?
 
It was my mother who first taught me the art of letting go.  My whole life I had been a homebody with no desire to stray from the borders of my little hometown of Sandy, Oregon.  However, that all changed when I felt God’s calling on my life to attend law school in Virginia.  I know that it was very difficult for my mother to let me leave her nest and go live across the country. 
 
One of the most difficult parts for her was when she received my desperate call. I was crying in despair because I could not find a place to live and I felt like no one in Virginia understood me.  Even though it was very painful for her, she did not fly to Virginia and take me back in her arms or drag me back home where she could again provide for me. She simply comforted me with words of encouragement, prayed for me and entrusted me to God.  I am so grateful that she did!
 
If she had tried to take me back and fix all of my problems herself, I would have never learned to trust God.  A large part of my testimony is God’s provision for me in finding me a wonderful place to live and in the amazing lifelong friendships that He gave to me during those years. 
 
It is this deep trust in God and His Love and Provision that has prepared me as I begin my own journey into motherhood.  I am currently expecting my first child. At around 12 weeks there were complications and I was rushed to the emergency room.  On the way I tried not to let fear overtake me but the fear of miscarriage kept creeping into my mind.  When I got into the emergency room and waited for the doctors, God started to speak to my heart.  I began to have a peace that no matter what happened it was okay because my baby belonged to God and whatever God’s plan was I needed to entrust my baby to Him.  I felt at ease knowing that no matter what was happening it was all in God’s Hands.  That peace was made even sweeter when the doctors finally came  in and I saw my baby dancing around on the ultrasound and saw that precious little heartbeat.
 
In the following weeks I was comforted by Psalm 139:16 (NIV), “All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.”  I do not have to worry about my baby and can fully entrust his or her life to God because I know that God already has all of my baby’s days written in His book and I can trust Him to carry out His plan in my baby’s life. 

Recently, my mother was diagnosed with cancer.  It has been difficult to witness her suffer through treatment and the horrid side effects that come with it.  It has also been difficult not knowing whether I have 20 more years or 20 more days with her.  However, the lesson she taught me has sustained me in this time.  I have peace knowing that I can entrust her life to God and that just as He has all of my baby’s days written in His book, He has all of her days written in it as well. 
 
Perhaps the most difficult part about being a mother is also the greatest gift that we can give to our children.  Letting them go and entrusting them to God allows them to learn to trust God with their own life.